First Solo Road Trip

This past weekend, I embarked on a (semi) solo road trip (I say semi as I was going for a church group trip). I would be driving from Phoenix to San Diego all by myself with no one else in the car with me. Two of my friends were supposed to come with me, but ended up not being able to go on this trip. Prior to this, the road trips I had taken had always been with at least one other person, never by myself.

I’m not going to lie and say I wasn’t nervous or scared to be doing it alone. I was scared. I was nervous and to be honest, I still am. It’s only been one day on my trip so I have to make the return home but at least I’ve done half of the work.

As someone who struggles with anxiety, going alone was a nerve racking thought. It’s unsettling to be going 6-7 hours by yourself while also knowing that there should’ve been other people in the car with you. I didn’t know how I was going to be with my own thoughts for that amount of time or fill the emptiness. Yet somehow along the way I found the journey kind of fun.

I got to sing. Listen to podcasts and learn. Dance to some Big Time Rush and Taylor Swift. Talk to God. Things that often get overshadowed in the day to day when I’m caught up in the business of life.

When I arrived in San Diego, I had to learn how to figure things out for myself and branch out of my comfort zone. As an introvert, this is an extremely hard thing for me to do. I had to check in for myself, figure out where to park, walk to where I was going to eat lunch. Simple things that I dismiss when I’m with someone else, but when I’m alone, I have to work through.

I will say through what I have done today (day one of my trip), I’m quite proud of myself. Just a year and a half ago, I wasn’t driving on freeways in Arizona because I was scared of them and now I’m driving 380 miles on freeways by myself to another state! I walked 40 minutes alone in a city that I hardly know to have lunch at one of my favorite restaurants, and not once did I think about turning around. The progress that I have made in just 12 hours alone has been incredible.

I got to sing. Listen to podcasts and learn. Dance to some Big Time Rush and Taylor Swift. Talk to God. Things that get overshadowed in the day to day.

I don’t know what the next two days will bring me, but what I do know is that the days will be full of adventures and experiences that I’ll carry with me for the rest of my life.

So obviously I had to get back to Phoenix. Another 380 miles away. Although I really would have liked to stay in San Diego for as long as possible to avoid the reality of life.

I’m not going to lie, I tried to stay in San Diego for as much time as I could before I had to leave, but I knew at some point I was going to have to go home.

Again, the journey wasn’t as bad as I had made it out to be in my head. The only part that was kind of grueling was going over Laguna Pass. Those 30 minutes felt so much longer than they had the previous time. I had to deal with rain, road work pushing the highway to only one lane and the oncoming sickness that would hit me in the next week.

Once I had about two hours left in my drive, I did start to get a bit tired. I could feel my eyes getting tired and myself not wanting to be on the road any longer. I did what I had to do. Turn the music up, blast it and have a major dance party. It kept me awake for two hours, so it worked.

When I got home, I realized what had taken place. A road trip alone really doesn’t seem like that big of a deal, but for me it was. I had never been on the road alone for more than 2 hours on a trip where I’d have to get gas by myself and navigate a new city after traveling over a little mountain pass.

And my confidence was helped from this trip as well. I gained the confidence to drive long distances alone, to be open-minded when I have to adapt and be comfortable with the uncomfortable. Most importantly, I had to stay in the present moment to get through everything. Not getting ahead of myself or letting my anxiety take over when something didn’t go my way. Honestly, lessons that I’ll take with me and apply to other areas of my life that have needed these lessons for a long time.